I was still on the other side of the hall, waiting for the referee to call me. My whole body felt numb; I jumped, shook and jogged on my spot. As I was inhaling the most air I could have, my heart was making its way out of my throat. It was time to enter the new and slippery mats, my opponent looked straight to shaking pupils. I placed the last gear on my head and sealed it strongly. My gloved fists covered both sides of my squeezed cheeks as I yelled and started to strike.
Wednesday, 24 October 2018
A Paragraph of Emotion
WALT..Use 'show not tell'. This week my class have been practicing to use show not tell in our sentences/paragraphs. Our class had to do a paragraph of describing a specific feeling. I enjoyed doing this because I like this type of writing. What I found hard was using more show not tell with the feeling I had. What did you infer from reading my writing?
2 comments:
To support my learning I ask you to comment as follows:
1. Something positive - something you like about what I have shared.
2. Something helpful - add more info or ask me a question.
3. Something thoughtful - how have you connected with my learning?
Note: only a member of this blog may post a comment.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Hi Trinity,
ReplyDeleteI think you were inferring to someone play a game and the emotion was nerves you'r writing was very descriptive and that's what i enjoyed about it. I could see that you used a lot of i's and next time use a bit less I's.
Hello Naiema,
DeleteThank you for commenting on my blog post. Next time I will try to avoid adding too much 'I' on my paragraph/sentences. Once again, Thank you!